When we first came to this continent, we delivered a message via horsey mail. You wanted to get something over to some person in the next town over or what not… you hired the pony express! “Giddy up! Just watch out for them bandits along the way that want my recipie for roogabah stew!”
After a while came mail and the telegraph… followed by telephones… UPS and FedEx came into view sometime as well… (You can tell at this point in time I really don’t care about time lines and actually what came first… cuz it’s not my point… I’m building up to my point…) Then came fax machines… send documents instantly over phone lines!!! But no one really told you how bad it was going to come out. Then came email!! Woooo!!! Technology is grand!!
Well… not only can you send your friend over in a completely different city on a different content some video of a woman taking on a baseball bat… (and no I’m not talking about fighting one) in the same time it would take for you to write down your name on a piece of paper… but we’ve also decreased the amount of time it takes for some marketing place to send you crap that you never wanted to see.
Spam. Everyone loves it! Comes in so many different shapes and sizes. First, it came in your mail box and in your newspapers… then with the introduction of fax machines… companies started having their fax machines pick up incoming faxes from who knows where about some person in Tibet, who just moved down the street and is selling hot dogs for 10 cents less than the guy you used to go to. Do you care? No. And what ends up usually happening is that piece of paper gets a line drawn through Habib’s ad, and is put back in the fax machine to use the other side of paper for the next piece of useless trash to be faxed to you. Today my mail server pooped out on me. Why? Because my webmaster failed to tell me that there’s no spam filter on our server… AND… for some reason the stupid thing collects ALL improperly sent email. Why? I dunno… but every single bit of spam mail for viagra or credit reports or penis enlargement programs… breast enhancement ads… real estate propaganda and everything else under the sun of spam mail sits there. Eating up my freaking space. So today my boss comes up to me and says:
Boss: Spook… my email bin is full.
Spook: …eh? (checks free space on server… 120GB free…) ummm…
Boss: Someone sent me this on my other email address.
Spook: Oh… that email… lemme look.
1400 unread emails eating up 50 megs of space just sitting there collecting e dust.
The best part is when my other boss was disgusted because it took her an hour to receive an email… (gurgle…)
Pray for rain!!! It’s an e-drought!! It took one hour for me to receive an email
I weep for our future and feel sorry for IT people in the future:
Future End User(FEU): I have a problem with my email…
Future IT Person(FIP): …oh? And what did you fuck up today?
FEU: I sent myself an email today and I didn’t get it yesterday…
FIP: Oh… well did you forget to reset the time delivery date on the tachion that was going to be encoded with your message?
FEU: Oh I have to do that?
I despise spam in all of its forms (except actual Spam in a can - I don’t particularly like it, but I don’t despise it either). Fortunately, since I switched to Gmail, I don’t get more than one or two a months that gets by their spam filter.
ну и чё, страна здаровая, а толку?…
When we first came to this continent, we delivered a message via horsey mail…..